Coping with Grief

Perhaps you are reading this because you are experiencing grief or know a loved one or friend, who is experiencing grief. Many people are searching for answers. Please feel free to share your experiences on this blog. Any insight you can offer will be appreciated.

Grief can be the hardest work one will ever do.  Grief is exhausting.  Your body can ache. The physical pain when dealing with grief can be VERY real.

People will console you….for three weeks; afterward, they will think it’s time for you to move on.  Little do they know, grief is not like getting over the flu.  They are afraid to mention your loved one’s name because they don’t want to remind you of your loved one…..as if you aren’t already thinking of the one you lost nonstop.  People will offer advice, such as I know how you feel, My niece died or My dog died. Be assured that it is not the same.

Joining a support group, such as The Compassionate Friends (TCF) if you are a bereaved parent, can be very helpful.  It’s a worldwide support group that meets once a month. If you’ve lost a child, please see if there is a group in your area.

TCF can teach you – If you lose your parent, you lose your past; if you lose your spouse, you lose your present; if you lose a child, you lose your future.  There is NO TIMELINE for grief.  We all grieve at our own pace.

There are also bereavement groups for people, grieving the loss of anyone, be it spouse, sibling, friend, even a pet.  Hearing from people, who’ve walked in your shoes, is very comforting.  One thing you will learn is time does NOT heal all; however, time does take you further from the moment.  

Perhaps the BEST thing a friend can do is say, I’m sorry and give you a hug.  They will say, Call me if you need me.  Heck, you don’t know what you need.  You’ve never experienced this.

Now, please know this, if you can work the stages of grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression & Acceptance; you can feel & laugh again.  This is not to say you will completely get over it.  That is NOT an option; however, you can live a normal life.  It will just be a new normal life.

If you would like to learn more, read or at least review the ebook, Rise Above: Conquering Adversities 2nd Edition.  It’s also available in paperback format.